Eulogy for Hattie Mikolajczyk -- including the story of Aunt Hattie's shoes

Eulogy for Hattie Mikolajczyk --

including the story of Aunt Hattie's shoes

delivered on January 29^th, 2000
Gesu Church
Toledo, Ohio

by Thomas F. Piatkowski

My name is Tom Piatkowski -- I am a nephew and godson of Hattie Mikolajczyk.
It is an honor to have been asked to say a few words of eulogy in memory of Hattie Glowacki Mikolajczyk ... a lady that has so consistently and lovingly touched us all.
When Aunt Hattie passed away last week she was 94 years old. She had lived an active business, social, and family life in which she exhibited a great love for people and for having a good time with them.
There is no way that I can, from my own experiences, adequately know or capture the fullness of such a life as hers -- and I will not pretend to try.
What I would like to do is relate to you just a few very personal insights of my life with Aunt Hattie -- and then invite each of you when we gather later -- today (at the cemetery or at the reception), or anytime, to share your stories about Aunt Hattie, too.
I want to begin with just one story -- the story of Aunt Hattie's shoes. This is a story that I have repeated to myself many times -- which I have shared with my children and others many times -- and which today I would like to share with you.

Aunt Hattie, I've never told you this story before -- but I know you can hear me -- and so today I'm sharing it with you, too. I hope it brings back memories.

The story needs a little background, especially for the youngsters here and others not familiar with everything in Hattie's life.

Hattie lived her whole life in Toledo. Until she was middle aged, she lived at home with her parents in the family home on Austin Street, just behind the family hardware and furniture store on Lagrange Street.
My mother, Felice, one of Hattie's younger sisters, married Stephan Piatkowski, and they established their family in Ann Arbor, Michigan... where they raised six children, of which I was the oldest.
I was Aunt Hattie's nephew -- and she was my aunt and godmother.
For a number of years, when I was about, oh, ten to twelve years old, one of the big treats of every summer was to come ALONE to Toledo and spend a week with Aunt Hattie -- which really meant a week with aunt Hattie and Grandma and Grandpa Glowacki (those were the years when Aunt Hattie wasn't married).
One of the exciting aspects of these visits was getting to go with Aunt Hattie and WORK in the store ... with Uncle Al and Uncle Chester, and so on... but those are other stories. Today, I want to tell you...

The Story of Aunt Hattie's Shoes

It was during one of my summer visits to Aunt Hattie's that she decided she would like to take me shopping for a new pair of shoes. And I thought it was a terrific idea.

So, the next morning we both hopped into her car and drove to downtown Toledo... to what was probably the best shoe store in town. Her objective was to get me a pair of shoes that I really liked... probably something special. It was an objective I liked, too.

The salesman was very energetic and the selection of shoes beginning to appear before me was beyond anything I was accustomed to back in Ann Arbor.

Then, at some point, I not only saw the wonderful shoes we were considering... but I also noticed the prices... and somehow, using my naive ten-year old logic and wisdom, I suddenly saw that I had a duty to find a way to help Aunt Hattie not spend her money on shoes for me.

And so began our full day's effort. We went from store to store for the whole day. I had never seen so many different shoes... leather shoes, cloth shoes, ventilated shoes, loafers, oxfords, shoes with crepe soles, shoes with lug soles, ...and so on and so on. But somehow, despite the large selections and the many stores and the conscientious salesmen, something was always not quite right -- the shoe was too long, or the shoe was too short, or too narrow, or too wide, or it pinched, or I already had a pair like that one, or... or... or...

And so, at the end of the day, what did we have? Two weary, sweaty, frustrated people. One my dear Aunt Hattie, outwardly frustrated; and the other, an inwardly frustrated youngster, who (however cleverly and politely) had found a way to continuously say NO.

How much happier both would have been if he had said YES.

It wasn't until a few years later that I began to realize the lesson the seeds of which had been planted that day...

Say YES to those who want to please you and gift you.

Aunt Hattie was a woman who said YES to life. She accepted the situations in which God and others had placed her -- and to an extraordinary degree she said YES.

She said YES to being my godmother and doing the special things a godmother can do -- for a whole lifetime.
She said YES to working in the family business so her younger sisters could go to college.
She said YES to taking care of her aging and then infirm parents -- by living with them until they passed away.
She said YES to all the members of a large and extended family -- including some of whom went north to Michigan... to become Wolverines ... or even worse: Democrats.
She said YES to Uncle Mickey and the changes in her life that he offered to her.
She said YES to meeting people, going places, and making the best of every situation as best she could see how.
She said YES to accepting others and avoiding being unnecessarily critical.
She said YES to EVERY ONE OF US!

In her life, all of us here have been blessed.

Dear Aunt Hattie -- we thank you for the many gifts you have given us.

I am sorry that I didn't let you get me those shoes so many years ago... shoes which at best would have lasted perhaps a year.

But I am very happy for the lesson you enabled for me and which has profited me for a lifetime: the lesson of Aunt Hattie's shoes.

But most of all I thank you, Aunt Hattie, for the lifetime example you have set

"to life... and all it offers... SAY YES !"

There is no better way each of us here today could honor the memory of Aunt Hattie -- than in each of our lives, ... and in all that we are offered

to say -- YES !